Half Nekkid Thursday - #32

Wanna know why everyone's gettin' nekkid?? Click the link above and visit Osbasso to find out.

Did ya miss me?? Well I missed you, and I hereby vow, to never let internet issues or Turkey Day interfere with my getting Nekkid ever again. Amen. Lately I've had the urge to ride naked on the back of a bike. Well...not a bike...but a BIKE. But then I thought...damn...that would be fucking cold...so here's me acting out only half of my fantasy...half nekkid.

...number thirty two in my half-nekkid journey is ...you just can't choose what's she's gonna do.



did you get nekkid??

Way Back Wednesday - Blow Jobs and Cream

It's hump day and the day we play that game where The Kept Woman asks us to post embarrassing pictures of ourselves online for all the world to see.

This weeks theme is: It's just nature...primal if you will. Even the animals do it. NO, not that...the process of beautification. Walk us through your beauty rituals as you primp...shaving? brushing hair? putting on lipstick?

Both of these babies go back...way back...to the skinny days aka the boobless days. I no longer have bones popping out my body...in fact...I can hardly even find my bones anymore.

Anywho. Picture number one. A must in daily ritual, especially now, in the dry cold winter months...creaming up. Here I am putting on my daily dose of probably Lubriderm. Just look at those sexy little girl legs...and full bottom panties!! Feel free to ignore the wallpaper and everything else in the room. This was my second rental ever...and old chicken coop turned cottage at Rye Beach...we painted and papered before moving in, and well, we did the best we could on a budget of less than nothing.



Photo number two. The blow job...and not that kind of blow job, thanks. I can live without doing that every day. Sorry guys, it's true. What I can't or shouldn't live without is blowing out the natural wave. I'll admit there are times when I let the locks dry naturally. What happens isn't pretty. I end up looking like some chick straight out of the 70's. And not the kind with the nicely ironed hair...something more like Janice Joplin meets Marsha Brady. So, yeah. I blow it out and here I am pre- blow, in a hotel room in Jamaica. See the hip bones??



Did you play??

And so it begins...

Another hectic holiday season filled with Christmas trees, mistletoe, and growing credit card bills. I love it.

We had a great Thanksgiving visiting with family, and aside from the two and half year old meltdowns, I think Jack enjoyed it too. This was the first holiday we've spent with family in four years. Lots of commotion, food, beer, and a puppy thrown in for some extra excitement. I'm not sure I've ever seen my child as overstimulated as he was, but as we were leaving he sat in the back of the car begging for "more", so it couldn't have been a bad thing.

It's obvious he hasn't inherited his father's (or mine, for that matter) anti-social gene. Okay. Maybe anti-social is a bit harsh. Layed back might be more accurate.

Anyway, we reached a few milestones over our little holiday trip. Jack slept in a "big boy" bed all by himself for the first time and didn't fall out. In fact, I'm pretty sure he didn't even move, which is a good sign considering he'll be moving into his own after Christmas.

I also discovered that traveling in the passenger seat at night, in the dark, is not nearly as stressful for me as it is in the daylight hours. I'm not sure why, but there wasn't even a hint of anxiety, and I don't think I slammed on my make believe brakes even once.

Lastly, I learned that I don't really need a vacation per se, I just need to stay in a nice hotel for a couple of days here and there. I could seriously drive 10 miles down the road, book a room and just hang out and never leave the hotel. Think about it. I never have to make the bed, or clean up. I take a shower, throw my towel on the floor, and while I'm downstairs using the hotels free internet access, the towel fairy replaced the used ones with new ones. And room service. What's not to like about room service. I don't think Jack's daddy thought it was as enjoyable, but then again, he gets all this stuff done for him at home anyway. For me, it was like having a wife.

Anyway. End of one Holiday. Beginning of another. I'm tired. To give you an idea of how tired I actually am...last night I asked Jack's daddy if the broom was in the garage. Not an entirely stupid guestion...until I tell you, we don't have a garage. Yeah. In two days I've managed to get the tree and Christmas decoration up (minus the outside lights which will be next weekend), and get all of my sons shopping out of the way. I'll admit I had some help from my good friend, the internet, where the shopping was concerned. Still more to do, but I'm betting I can knock it all out in one more trip. Two at the most. And then they'll be nothing left to do but sit back, put my feet up, and suck down some rum and eggnogg until the big day.

I would like to see a little snow, though. Yes, I said it. But I also said "a little"...so, Snow Fairy, if you're listening...."a little...a fucking little. That does not mean three feet..got it?" We've actually been too warm for snow over the past few days. I tell you, this global warming thing is doing wonders for the New England weather.

Pictures are coming. Over and out.

A turkey's dream...

Okay, then.

I lost my internet for about a week and half, which is why I've been MIA. Luckily, it was found today and all is well the world again. Or, it will be once I'm finished catching up on all the things I wasn't able to do. Next week should be business as usual. Which basically means, I'll be back to spending too much time online and neglecting my real life responsibilities. Can't wait!!

Short and sweet today, but I wanted to wish all of you a Happy Turkey Day! All. Of. You. That means, those of you who comment regularly, and those of you who lurk, thinking that somehow you're hiding in the shadows like a spy. Yeah, you too. Happy Turkey Day.

We'll be heading back to my hometown tomorrow to spend the day with family, many of whom I haven't seen in years, and who have yet to meet Jack. I'm looking forward to it and it should be fun, aside from the drive we'll have to make in what looks to be some very wet weather. Riding shotgun next to Jack's Daddy is rarely a very relaxing experience for me, even in good weather. This might be a job for my good friend Xanax.

See you when the food is gone and drink's been drunk.

Stuff Portrait Friday - yes, no, maybe?

TGIF, Bitches!

Today I'm playing SPF with Kristine over at Random and Odd. Today's theme: This week is a little ‘out of the box, overthinking, or underthinking, off the hook or in the oven’. Basicly it’s going to be hard or easy, it’s up to you.
1. YES!
2. NO!
3. MAYBE.

1. Yes


Big yes! Like I said, it's Friday. After yet another exhausting week the only quesiton I want to here is..."would you like another?". Care to join me? I gotta warn you though...we only have the cheap stuff here. If it's something fancy or hard you're looking for, you'll have to bring your own. ;)


2. NO


And I have to stop doing this. Really. Not even just a little. I have the gum, so here I go.

3.Maybe


Bottle #1 = prenatal vitamins. Bottle #2 = my little pink pills (aka wonder drug). I can't have both. I need to choose. Soon. I've been going with bottle number one for a few months now hoping for a quickly planted seed. Hasn't happened, and I've started to wonder if planting that seed is such a good idea afterall. I'm on a downward spiral where the anxiety is concerned and I can feel my need for bottle number two growing. I still haven't decided which one I will take when I wake up tomorrow morning. Maybe number one. Maybe number two. Or...maybe I won't take either because I'll wake up a completely different woman. Maybe.


Have a great weekend and let me know if you played!

Half Nekkid Thursday #31

Wanna know why everyone's gettin' nekkid?? Click the link above and visit Osbasso to find out.

It's been a long week guys, and it's still only Thursday. WTF. Although... I don't know why I'm so anxious for the week to be over...my weekends are usually stock piled with even more shit to do. How's a girl get a break? Anyway. I almost forgot about HNT this week but remembered just before I was ready to hop in the shower. Last minute, but it's kind of working for me. This week I give you...

...number thirty one in my half-nekkid journey ...mirror mirror...where's the door.



This is a dark house, very big.
I made it myself,
Cell by cell from a quiet corner,
Chewing at the gray paper,
Oozing the glue drops,
Whistling, wiggling my ears,
Thinking of something else.

-Sylvia Plath, from Dark House


Did you play?

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Do you listen?

No Way Back Wednesday today because TKW has decided to take a little vacation. The nerve. I swear.

So, I'm left to my own devices today, which, by the way, is never a good thing. Or maybe it is. Because I'm resisting talking about the "right now", I decided to do my own way back wednesday of sorts, and break out the old journals. This one focuses on dreams. Not the kind that you actually want for yourself, though. The kind that happen late at night when you're fast asleep.

11/8/1996 (holy fuck...ten years ago)

Watched the X-Files last night and Scully reminded Mulder of something he always used to say -Dreams are the answers to questions we have not yet learned to ask.-

And that reminded me of what I used to believe and why I started recording my damn dreams in the first place.-To find their meaning or at least their significance in my life. My dreams are vivid. Strong. They stay with me, sometimes for years. I still remember the dreams I had as a child.

It also made me wonder if dreams are the answers to questions we're too afraid or ashamed to ask. Maybe dreams are admissions to ourselves, of things we wouldn't or couldn't dare admit to while awake. I think that to some extent, they are truths about who we really are and what we really want. Basic desire and need. The raw essentials. I think one of the main reasons people don't believe in their dreams is because they tend to analyze. What they need to do is listen. Listen to what they're telling you. About yourself. About others. When we analyze, sometimes our dreams don't seem to have anything to do with the person that we think we are. But, when you actually listen to what your dreams are telling you, often times, you find out that you're NOT the person that you think you are.

Scully and Mulder. Damn.

A list is a list is a list is a list

What I did last weekend:

1. Dinner and Drinks on Friday night with a non-mutha who is actually crazier than I am. Literally. Chatted it up with the owner of the restaurant, and continued on for more drinks. Got a sufficent buzz and played with Ella, the pitbull. Quote of the night: People are stupid. I don't trust them not to fuck with simplicity. Retuned home to a late night chat with B.

2. Saturday...bought some polyfil, paintbrushes and canvases. Organized my photos and video clips. Deleted about 180 emails that I really didn't need. Went to BJ's to stock up on diapers, paper towels and toilet paper. You can never have too many of either.

3. Sunday...bought food. Finished a doll, assembled the doll, took photos of the doll, worked on the photos of the doll, and listed the doll on ebay. Also listed some random purple glass.

3. That's it. End of weekend.

What I learned over the weekend:

1. If you eat smoked pork you will continue to burp up the smoked taste for roughly three days afterwards

2. Spending two hours straight slouched over the computer will cause the muscles in your chest to tighten

3. We're always missing out on something great...whether we know it or not

4. If you allow a toddler to play alone in his room for longer than 5 minutes, you will pay for it for the next hour

5. Lack of sleep + too much caffeine = nervous bitch

6. I'm going down...slow dancing in a burning room

7. I really don't like cold weather

8. I really shouldn't have moved back into the cold weather


I think that's it. If I did learn anything else, I'm sure I've already forgotten it.

I have...

...no words of my own today. So I give you these...

I tell you how I feel
But you don't care
I say tell me the truth
But you don't dare
You say love is a hell
You cannot bear
And I say gimme mine
Back and then go there
For all I care
I got my feet
On the ground
And I don't go to
Sleep to dream
You got your head
In the clouds
And you're not at
All what you seem
This mind, this body
And this voice cannot be
Stifled by your deviant ways
So don't forget what I told you
Don't come around
I got my own hell to raise

I have never been
So insulted in all my life
I could swallow the seas
To wash down all this pride
First you run like a fool
Just to be at my side
And now you run like a fool
But you just run to hide
And I can't abide

I got my feet
On the ground
And I don't go
To sleep to dream
You got your head
In the clouds and
You're not at all
What you seem
This mind, this body
And this voice cannot be
Stifled by your deviant ways
So don't forget what I told you
Don't come around
I got my own hell to raise

Don't make it a big deal
Don't be so sensitive
We're not playing
A game anymore
You don't have
To be so defensive
Don't you plead me your case
Don't bother to explain
Don't even show me your face
'Cause it's a crying shame
Just go back to the rock
From under which you came
Take the sorrow you gave
And all the stakes you claim
And don't forget the blame

I got my feet
On the ground
And I don't go
To sleep to dream
You got your head
In the clouds and
You're not at all
What you seem
This mind, this body
And this voice cannot be
Stifled by your deviant ways
So don't forget
What I told you
Don't come around
I got my own hell to raise

and so we dance...

I have this thing I like to do. I like to dance. In my kitchen. Usually at night, when I'm alone, while listening to whatever music happens to be tickling my fancy at the time. If you were a fly on the wall of my home (and provided I didn't swat and kill you) this would be a typical conversation you would have heard over the past eight years.

Me: So what are you gonna do?
JD: I was gonna watch TV. Why? what are you gonna do?
Me: I dunno...do you wanna dance??
JD: dance??? (with a look that can only be described as--are you fucking crazy?)
Me: yeah. dance.
JD: here?? (again, with the look)
Me: yes here.
JD: in the kitchen? there's no music. (a slight chuckle and a shake of the head)
Me: we can put on some music. No?
JD: we can't dance in the kitchen (again, a shake of the head as he walks back in the living room to watch TV)

This is the typical response I've gotten every time I asked that question, yet, for some reason it never stopped me from asking again. I can't tell you exactly how many times I've asked. If I had a dollar for every time...well...I probably wouldn't be rich, but I bet I could pay off my house and live the good life for a few years. Only a handful of times, has he indulged me, but even then the dance lasted for all of thirty seconds.

So...I've danced alone. Until now. Now, I have Jack, and Jack loves to dance. Even in the Kitchen. He'll dance to Kelly Clarkson or the Eagles. He doesn't care. He never looks at me like I'm crazy and when he laughs it's because, at that moment, he's the happiest little boy in the world. Now, you tell me, what's so crazy about that?

Lately we've started "dancing" right before he goes to bed. We'll stand next to his bed and he'll wrap his arms around my neck and put his head on my shoulder. And we sway...from side to side.

Jack: We dancin', Mommy?
Me: yeah, we're dancing Jack.
Jack: mmmmm....dancin'.

And so...we dance.

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Anyway.
TGIF, Bitches! Tonight this crazy mutha is finally going to get the chance to let her hair down. Yeah, there will be drinks involved. I'm not sure how many exactly... we'll just have to wait and see how I'm walking. This a big deal for me, because, I rarely go out. 99% of the time I am mom. An at home mom. Who has only the internet and her make believe friends to get her through the day. Anyway, tonight is my 1% and I'm taking it ALL baby. (that sounded nasty) Fuck it. See you Monday...

Half Nekkid Thursday - #30

Wanna know why everyone's gettin' nekkid?? Click the link above and visit Osbasso to find out.

Now I do my Halloween theme... after it's all said and done. A day late and a dollar short. Yup. That's me. For those of you who have already been gawking at my little cleavage this won't be anything new. Well it's a little bit new, because I cut off my head. I'm not sure why I do that. It's not like you haven't seen my face before. Anyway.

Today we have

...number thirty in my half-nekkid journey ...don't stand so close to me...



Young teacher, the subject
Of schoolgirl fantasy
She wants him so badly
Knows what she wants to be
Inside her there's longing
This girl's an open page
Book marking - she's so close now
This girl is half his age

Did you get nekkid?

Way Back Wednesday - Dumb and Dumbest

I love Wednesday! Time to play that game where The Kept Woman asks us to post embarrassing pictures of ourselves online for all the world to see.

This weeks theme is: I stuck pumpkins in my bra last week, surely you have a dumb picture to share too! This week's theme: the DUMBEST picture you own and are willing to post on the internet.

Okay. I can do this. To be honest, I don't think this is the dumbest picture I own. I'm sure I've already posted that one, but because this is a new Blogger Year for me I'm trying not to post any repeats (although I will be tomorrow). Here's me circa 1994...




Like I said, not the dumbest, but dumb nonetheless. Camping. In the Rain. (not to mention smoking in the rain) I'm not sure if you can see the huge puddle forming in the middle of our campsite, but trust me...a HUGE puddle was forming in the middle of our campsite. In fact, our sleeping bags could have easily been mistaken for waterbeds. You see the tarp over the tent and wood?? Yup. Cuz we were staying. Not packing up and heading home like the normal person might do in the middle of a flood, but standing our ground through hell...or high water. (I've just now figured out where that saying originated from...)

Did ya play?

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Blogger is still being a Bitch, so I'll try more Halloween pics later...