Spell it like it sounds

The English language according to Hope.

I am the worlds worst speller. I love to write, but I can't spell. Simple as that. Spell check is my best friend, though I may often forget to use it. Looking up a word just takes too much damn time out of my day and in the grand scheme of things is it really that important if I spell things correctly? Is it? I'm asking you. I'm pretty sure that I would still be able to get my point across. For example, if I say to you, my nose is runnin so I haf to go get a tishew. You get what I'm saying, right? Or if I say, I'm so dam tirerd today and I just wish sumwon wood cum wach my kid so I can take a brake. Or how about, wut the fuk is up with this shity ass wether? You would realize I'm commenting about the shitty ass weather, am I correct? So, then, why? Is it because it makes me sound all ghetto and shit? (any time I say all ghetto...and shit...must follow it. I'm not sure why.)

Here's just few words that really should just be spelled the way they fucking sound:

tissue - tishew, as I said
wednesday - wensday
february - febuary
salmon - samon
phsyco - syko or syco if you prefer
toilet - toylit
brother - bruther or brutha if you're from anywhere near Boston (same for sista, mutha, and fatha)
ovary - ovury (uterus is pretty much fine the way it is. Same for penis and vagina)
bitch - bich (again, anything ending in tch should just drop the damn "t". Do we pronounce it? No. Do we need it. NO.

Like I said, just a few. I could think of more but I'm sure there are more important things I should be doing right now.

I've heard it said that the English language is one of the most difficult to learn. No fucking wonder! Maybe it's just our nature as humans to try and make things more difficult for ourselves. If there's an easier way it must not be the best way. Lets see how we can further complicate matters. And rules. We just love all the rules. Which you can probably tell I don't really like to follow. I do, though. For the most part, but I don't like it.

Okay. I'm done with my obsessive rant. I'm gonna go try to get sumthin ucomplished now so I can feel pruductiv.

BTW, Jack's Daddy was an English Major. I'm sure I make him very proud.